Day 279 Indecision

I spend all day making decisions.  What further mammographic views do you want, Dr Lo?  Do you want compression views? Tomosynthesis? Tomo-Combo?  By the time I get home my brain is drained.  I eat and I sit down.  Tonight I started to look at hotels in Salzburg, having registered last night for ESGAR 2014.  Do we stay close to the venue?  Do we spend as little as possible on accommodation?  Do I risk the recent negative reviews on TripAdvisor that reported over-booking and having to move to a hotel 15 min away?  I used up my decision making capability during the work day and find myself incapable of deciding anything when I get home.  It’s worse than trying to order from a menu.  I change my mind so many times I forget what I wanted by the time somebody takes our order.  Then I just want what Daniel ordered when the food arrives.

Tonight Dan received news that a family friend’s elderly mother died, in casualty.  It reminded me of years ago when I was working as the On Call Medical Registrar and one of my friends in ED referred me a patient, dying, for admission.  Just get her to the ward as soon as possible.  I’ll admit her on the ward. I don’t want to die in a monitored bay in the chaos of an Emergency Department.  Sometimes it takes only a little extra effort to make a big difference.  I hope we made a difference that day.

Today was a long day.  We had multidisciplinary rounds before work, and there were a lot of cases to show relevant radiology: screening mammograms, ultrasounds, MRI examinations.  I drank my coffee from my vacuum flask.  The morning was busy, it’s a blur now.  I got a coffee from Tim Hortons.  At lunch I presented the monthly Breast Fellow Rounds.  It was relatively painless, my last presentation.  The afternoon was a blur.  At a quarter to five one of the surgeons came to discuss a case, and we concluded that we would offer an ultrasound-guided procedure.  “When can you do it?” he asked as he was leaving.  Tongue-in-cheek I looked at the clock and quipped, “There’s still fifteen minutes left in the day, I could do it now!”  I hadn’t realised that the patient was one floor down, actually in the hospital.  Or that I’d just offered my soul to the devil. My answer was intended to convey that it was a simple procedure and we would not have trouble to accommodate the request sometime in the indefinite future; it could be done in a fifteen minute booking.  Instead, my big mouth blabbed before my brain thought what I was about to say, and I quickly found myself still at work after five o’clock when the very happy surgeon had left an otherwise empty department and I had an add-on procedure to do.  Thankfully my sonographer didn’t kill me.  I was late to rounds.

Dan was excited today that his book now has an ISBN.  I suppose I’ll have to read it, when it’s actually published.  I hope I haven’t spoiled the narrative, having read his brainstorm plans for the sequels scrawled in marker pen all over our windows.  Who am I kidding?  At home we have 2 copies of a few DVDs because I bought them, forgot I bought them, and bought them again.  I watch entire films thinking that they seem vaguely familiar because we already saw them!

One more day until the weekend.

Beckoning Blood





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