Penultimate night on call. Although I’m only doing 6 of 7 days (having had Monday off due to a shift swap) and as a fellow I’m only second on call over night (and don’t get called) I’m running on empty. I’ve been sleeping in because I can’t get to sleep until 1 or 2 am, then I stagger to work at noon and spend the next 10 hours in a delirium. All cases now look the same. Another appendicitis. Another post op Whipple’s with vascular reconstructions. Another 4-phase CT liver with 6 prior RFA zones and 5 indeterminate arterial hyper vascular lesions without washout or hypo vascular liver lesions on the delayed phase without corresponding arterial hypervascularity. This Saturday morning we have nothing yet planned and I need to keep it that way. I don’t know how the residents manage their on call rosters, while studying for exams. I suppose all jobs have similarities: I’ve been juggling several research projects and conference posters while squeezing in travel every few months, on top of working full time. New parents barely sleep all night feeding and comforting a new life. Work feels Sisyphean this week. I get home feeling empty, all my neurotransmitters drained. I don’t have the energy to see or talk to anybody, except Daniel. Two more days until the weekend.
On the plus side we had a lot of laughs in the reporting room this afternoon. Kirsteen made fun of my Aussie accent, because I made fun of her Scottish accented attempt at a Kiwi accent. I found out that my Harvard-trained Fellowship Supervisor is able to longitudinally rotate his tongue while poking it out of his mouth. We had been talking about genetics. I’ll miss my colleagues here.